Turning Tables
by PolishCaskettShipper
Summary: Kate Beckett has just solved her mother's murder. What will happen next? Her walls had gone completely down and she's ready to dive into relationship with Castle. They will live happily ever after, won't they? My dream transferred into a story. Possibly spoilers!
1. Brave new world

**Hello everyone! ****This is a side effect of my boring holiday... ****The story shows what could happen after Beckett solved her mother's murder. ****I don't really know why something like that pop into my head... I dreamt it! **

**Just a short chapter for now. If you want more, let me know in reviews. I won't continue this if no one wanna read this...**

**Big hugs and thanks for my Beta Reader, mampher. One more time- THANK YOU!**

**Disclaimer: Oh man... Girls can dream, right? But no, I do not own Castle.**

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**CHAPTER 1**

**"BRAVE NEW WORLD"**

"Take a few days off, Detective." Victoria Gates said, standing beside her desk with a bossy look on her face. After a few hours, Kate finally filled her in on every detail of her mother's murder. Even the parts with Montgomery weren't left out. Gates hadn't been happy, but she'd understood.

"No, Sir. I've just got back… I'm fine, really." Kate Beckett answered quickly. The lie would work if she'd be a better actress, but she wasn't. The dark circles under her eyes and pale face spoke louder.

"It wasn't a request, Beckett. Go home, get some rest, be with your family." Captain hinted with light, almost ruthful smile. It seemed like Beckett's insubordination was long forgotten. "I don't wanna see you here till next Monday. Then, you'll be put on desk duty for a month. It's not dependent on me, it's protocol."

"Oh... I understand, Sir. And I just want to apologize for…" Kate muttered. She was ashamed of her earlier behavior. This woman here really didn't deserve that kind of treatment.

"No need to. I know that you all out there still think that I'm some kind of monster sent to you as a punishment or something, but we are all cops. And I am able to understand your behavior. I'm not saying that you can do whatever you like…but sometimes we just can't act responsibly."

"Thank you, Sir. But after all, I'm still sorry." Kate replied and back out the door. As she was almost out of the room, Gates called after her.

"Kate?" Beckett turned surprised hearing her first name fell from Gates mouth. "Congratulations."

"Thank you, Sir."

**..::~::..**

After she got back to her desk, Kate sat on the chair, sighing heavily. She truly felt exhausted, even though deep inside she'd never felt so free and light. Her mother finally could rest in peace. She could live fully. With Castle. She still could feel his touch from that night all over her body. Smile appeared on her face unknowingly. She had made love with Castle! He still loved her and they could be with each other now. Nothing stood on their way.

"Yo, Beckett, are you with us?" Espo waved in front of her face. She jumped surprised. "You dozed off."

"Oh, sorry. What's up?" She asked and took a sip of her long gone cold coffee.

"Really? _What's up?_ Beckett, you've just solved your mother's murder..." Ryan broke in.

"I know guys. I am really thankful for your help, but it's not like I'm going to keel over… I'm fine. Run-down but fine. But if you must know, Gates gave me a few days off, so I am heading out now, OK?" Kate replied deeply touched by the boy's brotherly concern.

"And you agreed to that? WOW! Who are you, chica?"

"Well, I tried, but it's not like I have a choice…" Beckett chuckled. "Anyway, have you seen Rick… Eh, Castle?"

"Now it's Rick, huh?" Ryan teased. She glared at him. Oh, if looks could kill… "Uh, when you were at Captain's, Castle said he's heading home. We assumed you knew…"

"Oh…" Beckett sighed. He had gone out without saying goodbye to her? It was weird. He'd acted a little bit off, but she'd thought it's normal. After all of this, he had right to be disoriented and shocked…

"Yeah. I don't even wanna know how he must feel right now… It's like some creepy movie." Esposito flinched. "Well, after normal circumstances he would be on and on about this… But…"

"Javi, just stop. It'd be better for all of us to just forget about all of this, ok? I check on him on my way home, so you don't have to worry 'bout your boyfriend, guys." She teased, trying to sound convincingly.

"I could argue about whose boyfriend we're talking about…" Espo started.

"Very funny…"

"Oh, c'mon! You were at Castle's at 4 in the morning! You can't deny it! We saw you two!" Ryan smiled at her cockily.

"Zip it! I'm going. See you on Monday, boys!" Beckett waved goodbye, unable to suppress a big grin as she headed to the elevator.

Her grin didn't fade away all the way to the Castle's loft. Why? She was happy! Kate finally could say that she was fully happy. Her mother's murderers won't get away with what they had done for sure. She had amazing friends. Castle took her back and gave them a chance. She had a family. Besides, she had her beloved job back. What else could she want?

One last time Kate smiled to herself and happily knocked at Castle's door.

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**So... Love it? Hate it? Someone wanna read more?**

**61 days till 'After the Storm'! Yay!**


	2. Part of your world

**Hello everyone!**

**Here is another chapter of my story. I know some of us will be disappointed that Castle doesn't appeared here, but I needed to write this. I hope you understand!**

**I'm really grateful to all of us who followed or ****added this to favorites. The biggest thanks belong to Obsessionsaremylife, , MelCR and Oz castle fan. I really appreciate your reviews. **

**Once again, I'd like to thank mampher for being my Great Beta Reader. Thanks for the chapter's title!**

**Disclaimer: No, I do not own Castle... **

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**CHAPTER 2**

**"Part of Your World"**

Kate heart jumped when she heard the steps coming closer and closer to the door. She could finally let the excitement of seeing Castle roll over her body. Before, she had always fought this down. But now, after all that had happened in the last few days, her wall had come down completely. She wasn't hiding anymore. Beckett was ready to dive into her new life. And Castle was the biggest part of it.

Her silent contemplation was broken by someone opening the door to the loft. As soon as it opened, the detective was gathered up by Martha. This woman looks fragile, but no one could give breathtaking hugs like her!

"Oh, Kate! I'm so sorry and so happy for you, darling!" The older woman almost sobs into Kate's shoulder.

"Thank you, Martha. But why are you sorry?" Beckett asked trying to loosen the embrace. Martha didn't look good. She was worried and had red eyes. Kate hadn't really seen Martha without a smile on her always bright face. And then it hit her. "Oh no… You feel guilty? Because of…Martha, it isn't your fault. Not a bit of it! You understand me?"

"I know Katie, but, either way, I feel guilty and I can't help it," the redhead said sadly. She seemed so small and vulnerable.

The detective shuddered lightly when she heard diminutive of her name. Only her parents called her that. She didn't know what else to do, so she pulled the older woman into another hug. This time she was the one giving a crushing hug. "I've never even thought that you or Rick… Oh God, that thought never crossed my mind… I'd be a horrible person for thinking this way! You're like family to me, Martha…"

"Oh, kiddo! You too! And I'm so happy for you and my son!" Martha said, finally with her shining smile and constant excitement. She winked at Kate, causing a heavy blush on the younger woman cheeks.

"Thanks Martha… Umm… So maybe you know where I can find him? He stormed out of the 12th without a word to me." She asked, couldn't hide the hurt in her voice.

"Oh, he texted me saying that he's going to The Old Haunt, catching up on paperwork."

"Castle and paperwork? Nice…" Kate smiled and then both woman burst into laughter.

"It's rare, so let him work a little then. Maybe you would like to have some coffee with me?" Martha asked warmly and lightly pushed the detective towards the kitchen counter.

"I'd love to."

"Lovely! My old friend got me some of this wonderful original Brazilian mix while he was there with his spectacle. You'll love it!" The redhead excited clapped her hands and headed toward the coffee machine.

Kate smiled at the eagerness with which the older woman prepared the drinks. She was comfortably sitting on one of the barstools and her thoughts unconsciously drifted toward Castle. It was strange. Knowing him, he'd not let go of her after what had happened. However, Kate decided to give him some time. First she'll drink her coffee and then head to The Old Haunt.

"Here you go, kiddo!" Martha handed her a big black mug. Beckett smirked when she noticed the inscription written in red letters on the outside of it. The actress raised her brows questioningly in her direction. "He said once, that we should have our own signature line… 'She's armed, he's dangerous. A whole new chapter in crime solving.' He had someone make it for him, hadn't he?"

"Yeah, he loves it. It's his favorite." Martha laughed lightly. After that both woman went silent, savoring delicious black liquid. It really was tasty.

"I met him at a banquet organized by his party…" The redhead said with visible pain in her voice. Kate shuddered.

"Martha, you don't have to…"

"No, it's ok. I want to tell you." She said patting the back of the detective's hand. "I had a friend whose husband was in that political party as well and she took me with her. That's how we met. He was funny, easygoing. We dated for a few weeks and then he had to leave for Washington. Two months later I found out that I'm pregnant. He didn't even want to hear about it…" The woman choked on the last words.

"Oh Martha! I'm, I'm so sorry." Beckett didn't know what else to say, so she put her hand on the redhead's shoulder, trying to comfort her somehow.

"No, sweetie. Considering recent circumstances, it's good that I raised Richard on my own. God knows what would have happened if this monster was present in our life." The actress breathed out heavily. "But it's enough of this depressing story. Today should be a happy day! I'm so proud of you! You have no idea how glad Alexis and I are that you two finally got together!"

"Speaking of which, where is Alexis?" Kate asked.

"She should be back any time soon. Her friends took her…" A soft sound of opening door cut in on Martha's words. "Oh! Speak of the Devil! Alexis, darling, is that you?" The older woman sang cheerfully going to the front door. "We have a very nice guest, kiddo."

The detective's heart started to beat faster. She was truly afraid of confronting Alexis. Their relationship had been shattered 'cause of her shooting and lack of contact through the summer. The girl was very distant and Kate didn't blame her. Alexis had every right to be upset.

Beckett jumped out of the barstool and slowly went into a living room. "Hello Alexis." She greeted her cautiously. She didn't know what else to say. Martha said that the girl is fine with her and Castle's relationship, but…

"Hi Kate. Can I call you 'Kate' now?" Alexis asked, with a petite smile on her face. She didn't seem angry, which made Beckett relax a bit.

"Of course you can. I'm..." the detective couldn't finish 'cause she suddenly found herself enveloped in another Castle flavored hug. The writer's daughter clung to her, burying her face in the woman's shoulder.

"You have no idea how happy I am for you two. I'm glad that you finally caught that bastard and got together with dad. I know it was awful for you this past year, but I was so scared. He loves you so much and he's careless and... I'm sorry," Alexis blabbered hugging Kate even more.

"Lex, I'm not angry at you. To be honest I was rather scared that you'll be furious with us getting together. I know I wasn't your favorite person recently but you have to know that I love your father too and I'd never let anybody hurt him. I promise," Kate said firmly, looking into girl's blue eyes.

"I know." The girl whispered and one more time hugged her.

Suddenly both of them heard someone sniffle. They looked up, spotting Martha looking at them with affectionate tears in her eyes. Alexis held her hand out to the older woman, pulling her closer. "Come here, Gram. Group cuddle time!" Three woman burst into laughter, hugging each other closely. They stood like that for quite a while. Martha was the first to stand back.

"Enough my dears. Oh! My makeup is devastating!" the actress exclaimed. "Excuse me for a moment."

Alexis and Kate smiled warmly at each other, both content with what had happened a minute ago. Then Kate remembered about Castle. She should check on him.

"Alexis, I really would like to catch up with you, but I need to go meet with your dad, ok? He acted weird today." Beckett said cautiously. Alexis did know that she solved her mother's murder, but the girl didn't know who the man responsible was.

"Oh, yeah… But you can come back later, you know… It's not like you have to go to your apartment for the night … You can stay with us…" Alexis said blushing.

"Thank you. It's good to know that you're ok with this… Us… I'd never want to drive a wedge between you and Rick." Beckett said, opening the front door. "So… See ya later?"

"Sounds great!" the redhead smiled, watching as Kate headed to the elevator.

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**So? What do you think? Let me know!**

**53 days to go!**


	3. Nightmare

**Hello! It's me again! I hope that someone still reads this story... **

**Once again, I am really thankful for adding my story to your follows and favorites. Thanks for reviewing goes to Corrie T and Lifeisgood. You've no idea how much your words means to me!**

**Bear hugs for my Beta Reader. Mampher, you're the best!**

**Disclaimer: You know that I do not own Castle, right?**

* * *

**CHAPTER 3**

**"NIGHTMARE"**

When Kate got to the Old Haunt, the bar was bustling with people. Since Rick was the owner, more and more people came here every evening. The place has experienced a renascence. A lot of cops came here too; since Castle declared once that everyone from 12th don't have to pay.

Beckett smiled at the memories of plentiful nights spent here with boys, Lanie, and Castle, of course. Jenny teamed up from time to time too. It became their small habit. Always, after closing a case, they've came here to celebrate. Kate loved the office in the basement. It was something mysterious and tempting about that place. It suited Castle.

The bartenders knew her, so it wasn't weird that, after the nod to one of them, she headed straight to the office in the basement. She couldn't surprise Castle 'cause the door creaked a little. There was no way that he didn't hear her.

He sat beside the oaken desk in a big comfy chair. In fact, she was the one who had found the two matching items on the antique shop. After he had bought the bar, he hadn't changed anything but the office. And during one of her rare days off, he'd dragged her shopping. He still didn't move, nor look at her. It was weird… He didn't do any paperwork either. The only thing standing on the desk was a bottle of scotch, two-thirds of the way empty. After a few moments of silence, Kate couldn't stand it anymore.

"Castle…? What's going on?"

No answer. He just flinched.

"You ran out of the precinct without a word. I went to the loft, but Martha said you wanted to catch up on paperwork over here. But from what I can see, you changed your plans…"

Again, just pure silence. Because of the soundproofed walls, even noises from upstairs didn't make it through the walls. It was so unnatural of him. After all, it was Castle! Annoying writer who can't shut his mouth for a second!

Beckett moved closer to him until she stood directly in front of him. Castle still didn't move a muscle. She kneeled down and touched his hand. Suddenly he sprang back like her touch was searing him. Finally he stood up and moved away from her.

"Cas… Rick, what is it? Why are you acting like this?" The woman asked, choking on the last word. She couldn't bear his rejection. Castle just laughed bitterly. And then there was silence again. The worst scenarios came to her head. "I was too late… Is that it? You… You don't want to be with me anymore…"

"God, Kate…" Castle spoke up finally.

"No! Just don't say that this night was a mistake, please! I… It was… I've never felt anything like this, you know? Just don't ruin this…" She said, sobbing. Tears began streaming down her face, smearing her makeup. But she didn't even care.

"I think you should go, Kate."

Beckett was sure that if someone punched her, it would hurt less. He's never rejected her, looking straight into her eyes before. A cold split over her heart.

"Rick… Don't do this… Please! Tell me what I can do to fix us?" She moved closer, but stopped, seeing him wince.

"You? God, Kate… You… You're amazing! I… I've never thought that I could love you more, but after that night we spent together… It hurts. Loving you and knowing that we can't be together…" Castle ran his fingers through his hair, before leaning back in the armchair and burying his head in hands.

"What…?" Beckett inhaled deeply. Her heart lit with hope, but she still was lost in that situation. "Why in the hell can't we be together!?"

"Really!?" He was shouting now too. "My fucking father killed your mom, Kate! My father! How could you even look at me!?" Then Kate understood his behavior. He was blaming himself, just like Martha. She had to prove him wrong.

"I love you, Rick! I don't care! Do you hear me? I don't care who that man was! So what if he was your father!? You didn't even know him! How could I lay blame on you for something done by a person entirely unknown to you!? He was Vice President too, so I should charge everyone who chose him!? It's sick, Castle! I said that to Martha and I'm saying this to you, you're my family and it'd be totally fucked up if I was to blame you!" Kate said firmly, taking his hand. Castle tried to get away, but she held him tightly. "Do you understand me? I love you and I would never blame you." She ended gently.

"Kate… Maybe you don't see it now, but… It'll always be in the back of your head." Castle said, softly removing his hands from Kate's. "I can't bear that. You finally can live fully and happily, Kate. And I can't give you that. I'm sorry, but… No, I just can't."

"Rick… Don't do this to us. We can get through this. Together! I don't want undiluted happiness if it means we're not together! I just want you!" Beckett screamed.

"I need time…" Writer sighed, looking vulnerable and resigned. "Can you give me that? I need to be alone?"

"OK… How long?" She asked cautiously.

"I'll call you…" They both flinched at the sound of this. Their conversation in hospital all over again. "Go, Kate. Please."

Beckett sighed and moved towards the stairs. But before Castle could react, she came up to him and rising on her toes kissed him lightly on the cheek. "I love you and I'll wait. As long as it takes, Rick."

By the time Castle opened his eyes, she was gone.

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**I really like hearing from you! Please, review this chapter. Like it or not?**

**45 days to go!**

**PS. That new photos of Stana? I still can't breath... So good!**


	4. Confessions

**Surprise! I like you so much that I got you a next chapter within 2 days! **

**But here is the thing, in September my 2nd year of High School begins and I predict that my updates will be rather sporadic, but I hope you understand! School is important, right?**

**Thanks for reviews goes to someguyshere and Sandy. Maybe I'm being rude now, but you guys are pretty lazy (excluding this two). C'mon! How long it takes to write one or two words of judgment?**

**Mampher, like I said lately, you're the best Beta Reader! Good luck with your university and this story of yours! I really want to read it!**

**Disclaimer: Nope, I do not own Castle... Only in my dreams. Like you don't know that!**

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**CHAPTER 4**

**"Confessions"**

Martha Rodgers and Alexis Castle were sitting at the kitchen counter, deeply engrossed in their Scrabble game, when they heard the front door being opened. The younger woman jumped down off the barstool and rushed to the door.

"Finally! We thought that you two forget 'bout us!" Alexis exclaimed teasingly. Suddenly the girl stopped. Something was wrong. "Dad, where's Kate?"

"Oh… She had something to do, pumpkin. Couldn't make it." Castle answered hoping to be plausibly enough.

"Dad, don't lie to me. Seriously, what happened?" It seemed that his daughter knew him too well to fall for his crap. He sighed and flopped down on the couch. Alexis followed him. "Did you argue?"

"Yeah, you could say that, pumpkin. We decided to give each other some space." The writer said cautiously, not wanting her daughter to know what's really going on.

"What!? Dad… You've just… Kate said before…" Alexis started, but was fast cut off by Martha.

"Darling, let your father rest a bit. It was an exhausting few days for him…" The actress said calmly.

"But Grams! Kate promised… "

"Alexis…"

"Oh… Whatever! But for your information I'm not a child anymore and I can handle the truth!" The girl said as she began climbing the stairs.

Castle buried his face in hands. He wasn't up to any conversations. He felt exhausted and empty. His world torn apart. Again. Then he felt a warm hand on his shoulder.

"Mother, I really don't wanna talk right now…"

"Kiddo, sometimes it's better to get this out of the system." The redhead muttered and enveloped her son with her arm, giving him the side hug.

"I told her that we can't be together…" Castle whimpered into his hands.

"Oh Richard… Why in the world did you say that?" Martha wondered. She was shocked. If her son dream't of anything, it would be about being in a relationship with Kate Beckett.

"He's my father! How could I condemn her to be with the son of her mother's murderer?!" Castle implored, trying to keep his voice quiet enough so that Alexis couldn't hear him.

"Don't you dare say that, Richard! That monster was never your father! Do you hear me? Never! He rejected you before you came into this world. It was always you and me, kiddo and let's stick with that." Martha exclaimed fiercely. "I know that I'm not the best mother in the world Richard. You deserve so much more, but that decision was supposedly the best I've ever made…"

"Mother…" Castle started finally raising his head. "You're the best parent I could've ever asked for. I love you and I'm not mad at you for hiding my father's name, but… I just feel guilty."

"Did you tell Kate that?" He nodded. "What did she say?"

"That she doesn't care and can't blame me for what he did… That she loves me…" The writer trembled at the last sentence.

"I felt the same way you do kiddo. But then, this lovely creature came here and told me the same thing. And I believed her, Richard. You should do the same." Martha suggested. "You've waited so long for you end up together, why waste more time?"

"Mother, I can't do this to her. Maybe she doesn't blame me now, but what will happen when she changes her mind?"

"Richard, that's not going to happen, she loves you too much. Besides, even if it does, it doesn't change anything. You'd be able to beat all the odds. You're both stronger when you're together." The actress assured.

"I… I must think 'bout it. I need some time…"

"Don't linger too long, kiddo. You two have already wasted too much time…" The woman said, standing up and headed upstairs.

After a while, Castle affirmed he's not up to doing anything. He was too distracted by his thoughts to write. Sighing, the writer headed towards his bedroom and after taking a long shower got to bed. However, he knew that sleep won't reach him. Not tonight.

**..::~::..**

At the same time, Kate Beckett stood in front of the very familiar but long time not seen door. She still had tears in her eyes. The thought that Castle would be the one who need a time has never crossed her mind. But she loved him and she was willing to wait for him. Besides, now she had other things on her shoulders. She had to talk to her dad. The woman took a final deep breath and knocked on the door. After a moment the door opened showing surprised Jim Beckett.

"Katie? What are you doing here?" The man asked. He and his daughter have always met at the diner. She rarely came here. The house reminded her of Johanna too much.

"Hi, dad. I'm happy to see you too. Can I come in?" Beckett asked trying to keep herself together.

"Of course." The man answered moving out of the way so his daughter could entered the apartment. "Katie, tell me what happened? Something wrong with that writer of yours?" Kate blushed.

"Rick isn't _my_ writer…" The detective protested, smiling lightly.

"Rick, huh?" He teased receiving a death glare. "Whatever you say… "

"Dad… I need to tell you something." Kate started, not knowing how break the news to her father in the least shocking way. "We should sit." She added, pointing to the couch.

"Katie… You're scaring me…" Jim said after they sat.

"I have no idea how to tell you this, dad. But…" Beckett took a deep breath before revealing the truth. "We found him."

"Found who, Katie?" The man asked with puzzled look.

"The man who had mom's killed…" Kate finally let herself break. The tears begin to fall. "Mom's case is closed, daddy." She sobbed.

"Oh, Katie…" The man gathered her in tight embrace, which caused more tears to spill. "Shhh… It's ok, baby. It's over…" Jim's heart ached for his little girl. He was relieved that they had found his wife's murderer, but he'd reconciled with Johanna's death long time ago. The closed case was only a final closure to him.

After what seemed to be a lifetime, the sobbing stopped. The detective stayed half-laid, cuddling into her father's chest. It felt good to have the comfort of being in someone else's embrace. But she hadn't finished her story yet.

"There is more, daddy…" She whispered, not recognizing her own voice. It sounded so small and weak.

"Kate, you don't have to tell me 'bout this. I'm going to hear everything during the trial anyway. Just don't think about this case… It's end. Everything's gonna be…"

"It's Castle's father…" Kate cut in, letting out another sob.

For a moment, heavy silence descended in the room.

"You said that he has only a mother…" Jim said confused.

Kate breathed a sigh of relief. He didn't sound angry. The last thing she wanted then was her father being angry and blaming Rick.

"He found out the same moment I did. Beloved daddy informed us himself when I put a handcuffs on him…" Beckett snorted sarcastically, remembering this awful smile on Dragon's face and the lost look on Castle's.

"Oh God… How's Rick holding up?"

"He's blaming himself…" Kate whispered, closing her eyes in order to stop new tears from falling. "He says we can't be together…"

"Oh…" Jim didn't know what to do. He and Kate haven't talked 'bout things like that. In moments like this, he missed his wife even more. "Katie… I don't… You know that he's not to blame here, right?"

"Dad! Of course I do. I was trying to put that into his head, but… He said he need time."

"Well, I think I understand him. We men need to deal with stuff by ourselves, you know? Just give him what he's asking for and he'll come around sooner that you think." Jim concluded, hoping that his words soothed her a little.

"I guess I don't have much choice…" The woman sighed, smiling faintly. "You know what? I'm hungry. I'm taking you to Remy's. C'mon, dad." Beckett stood, taking her father with her.

Later, when they stood in the hallway, waiting for an elevator, Kate wrapped her arm around his and kissed him lightly on the cheek. Jim didn't say anything, just smiled. "Has anyone ever told you you're the best dad in the world?"

"Yeah, my wild daughter hassling me to give her an extra $200 lacking so she could buy a motorbike."

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**Thanks for reading and I'm looking forward to hearing from you!**

**43 days to go!**


	5. Girl Talk

**Hello my dear readers! How is it going?**

**I am still in full bliss cause of sneak peaks from Season 4 DVD and this amazing scene from season 2 between Alexis and Kate. In my opinion they act not enough with each other...**

**Thank you, nath452, for your review. Guys, I really don't wanna sound like some kind of grouch, but really... 42 followers and one review!? C'mon! I need to know if writing this story is worth something... So I'm giving you an ultimatum: You get the next chapter if I see some reviews... (Yeah, you can hate me, but you forced me to this...)**

**Mampher, thank you for being my Beta Reader as ALWAYS!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Castle. I'm just introverted teenager with too much imagination and free time...**

* * *

**CHAPTER 5**

**"Girl Talk"**

Within minutes after 10pm had passed, Kate and Jim went their separate ways to head home. Beckett felt better. During dinner with her father she managed to forget a bit about her present situation with Castle.

The night was unusually warm, even for this season, so she decided to go home on foot. When she got there, a surprise was waiting for her.

"Lanie?" Kate called, coming out of the elevator. Her friend sat on the floor by the detective's door. "What are you doing here?"

"Girl! Imma smack you! First of all, you didn't answer your phone or give any sign of life for a few hours and you asking me now what am I doing here?" The ME hugged her and continued. "Secondly, why was Javier was the one who told me 'bout your mom's case? And thirdly, why isn't Castle glued to your side, making out with you in the name of catching up on lost time?"

"Wow… You really don't mince matters." Beckett laughed, trying to buy herself some time. "Maybe we should go inside and have this conversation in a more private place, huh?"

"Lead the way." The ME murmured. "That's a good start that you even want to talk 'bout it…" She added, after they went into Kate's apartment. Beckett shot her a look. "What? Just saying…"

"Lanie… I'm sorry, ok? My phone died and I didn't notice," The detective said as she sat on the couch, sighing painfully. Lanie followed her, trying not to rush her friend too much. She saw that something was off. They were both silent for a while, until Lanie couldn't stand it anymore.

"Girl… I'm trying to be patient here, but why don't you look like you've just closed the darkest chapter of your life and are going to live happily ever after with Writer Boy?"

"Did Javier fill you in the details of what happened?" Kate whispered trying not to let tears fall from her eyes.

"No, just that case's closed. Why?" Dr Parish asked concerned.

"That man… Who had my mom killed… Oh God!" Beckett sobbed burying her face in hands.

"Oh, honey… It's gonna be okay. He'll pay for it." Lanie muttered hugging her friend for dear life. She felt that it's not the end of the story, but didn't want to push.

"He's Castle's father…" Beckett mumbled in the ME's shirt. At first, Lanie thought that she misheard it, but Kate started to repeat it, like some kind of mantra, sobbing and trembling violently.

"Oh my…" That was the news that Dr Parish didn't expect to hear."I thought he didn't have a father…"

"Yeah, so did Castle and I." Detective said bitterly.

"How's he holding up?" Lanie asked. She liked Castle, even though she didn't show it too much. He made Kate happy and that was all what mattered for her.

"Bad. He's blaming himself. He said we can't be together, Lanie." The woman shuddered at the last sentence.

"He what!?"

"Yeah, you heard it right." Beckett laughed bitterly through her tears. And then she told Lanie everything, trying not to break down. When she ended, the ME was speechless. She hadn't words to console her friend. That wasn't the Castle she knew.

"Kate… I don't know what to say. I can't even imagine what he must feel right now. It's terrible!"

"You think I don't know that? Lanie, I promised him that I'd give him as much time as he needs, but… God, Lanie! I love him and I need him… "Kate ran her fingers through her hair, feeling helpless.

"Girl, I know that the current situations sucks, but you finally admitted your feelings out loud, I'm so proud of you!" Dr Parish smiled warmly at Beckett. "And I know that it just my trumpery, but he'll come around. He loves you too much, you know that."

"Yeah…" Kate smile reminiscently then yawned.

"OK girl, I see that you're halfway to dreamland. I should go…" Dr Parish pointed and got up from the couch. "You've had a couple of really rough days, you should rest. I know it's impossible, but try not to think 'bout everything what's going on, ok?"

"I'll do my best…" Kate muttered, opening the front door for her friend. "Lanie… Thanks for everything. I… You know I love you, right?" She said shyly.

"Kate…" The ME gathered Kate up into a hug.

"Just wanted to say it before I'll be too late and screw up again…" Beckett whispered.

"Oh sweetie… Maybe I should stay, hmm?" The woman asked seriously, worrying 'bout her friend.

"No, I'll be okay. Probably sleeping for the next 10 hours…" Kate assured. "Besides Javi would be upset if I stole you from him!" She added with devilish grin on her face. Lanie blushed furiously. "Oh, c'mon! Like we all don't know that you two hooked up again! I'll call you tomorrow. Bye!" She still laughed when the door slammed shut.

In that way, Kate found herself alone in her apartment. She wanted to cry again, but tears didn't want to fall. The Detective was too tired to even shower, so she only striped of her clothes and got into bed. Weirdly, she'd slept alone for a long time, but after only one night with Castle, she already had a problem with that…

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**So... Should I write the next chapter or not? **

**38 days to go!**


	6. Sing away the blues

**I am soooo sorry for not updating for so long... I am terrible I know. But I believe in your kind hearts... It just, so many things going on and I just can't find a little time for this...**

**Anyway, all this pictures, spoilers and promo! OMG! I can't wait! And I am sooo jealous of this people who watched 'After the Storm' already... Grrr!**

**Thank you very much for all reviews! They mean world to me and I feel a little bit ashamed of myself after I threatened you last time...**

**This chapter is posted WITHOUT BETA READING, so every mistake is mine. Feel free to point out every mistake! My Beta has some new things going on in her life and she can't keep checking out this story, so if you want to be my Beta or you know someone who would want to be, LET ME KNOW! I'll be grateful!**

**And this Monday my school starts so I probably wouldn't update for awhile again... Sorry guys...**

**Disclaimer: You know... :c**

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**CHAPTER 6**

**"Sing ****away the blues…"**

"Honestly Richard, how long are you planning to be like this?" Martha Rodgers asked her son, who was laying on the couch bluntly staring at the TV.

"I don't know, Mother…" Castle answered tiredly. "I don't really have anything else to do…"

"Really…?" Redhead questioned with irony. "I think you have plenty other things to do."

"Well, I don't think so. I finished the book…"

"For God sake, Richard! Drop this act!" Martha shouted angrily. She had enough of it. "I understand you're hurting, I do. I've always knew, you're drama queen, but…"

"But what?" He cut in, sounding pissed.

"You chose this scenario, but you're acting like someone else punished you. One word and Beckett would be here right away… This girl needs you, kiddo. She's maybe even in worse condition than you!"

"No! She needs happiness and I can't give her that." Writer stood and ran his fingers through his hair. "She'll forget 'bout us with time… Times is great healer, right?"

"Well, you're saying it like you wouldn't know Kate Beckett, kiddo… From my sources, I know that she has other plans."

"But I don't, so… I'm gonna take a nap. Don't wait…" He mumbled, going towards his office.

"She calls me everyday, you know…" Martha cut in, causing the writer to halt dead in his tracks. Beckett begged her to not tell Castle about this calls, but the actress couldn't watch him stupidly wasting his life any longer. "And guess who are we talking about?" She ended with ironic smirk.

"I'd be grateful if you wouldn't talk to her anymore, then." Castle said without confidence.

"Oh no, my son. I won't break contact with her only for your sake. She's not only part of your life, but mine and Alexis' too. And don't expect me to…" Martha snapped. She really liked Kate, maybe even loved her. She always wanted to have a daughter. The actress enjoyed her late phone conversations with Beckett.

"You know what, Mother? I'm gonna go for a walk." The man cut her off. "And please, just… I can't think about it now. Alexis went to IKEA, right? She wanted to buy some stuff. I think I join her." He said, walking out of the loft.

When Castle finally got out of the building, he texted Alexis. Even in his actual state, he felt like surprising her.

_Hey Pumpkin! When will you be back? Fancy laser-tag battle later? Love you, dad._

He decided to take a cab. The weather was moody. After a moment a yellow car pulled over in front of him. The reply came when he was giving directions to taxi driver.

_Sorry dad, gonna shopping all day… Maybe tomorrow? Eating lunch at the moment. IKEA diner's not bad… Love you too!_

The writer smiled, Alexis gave him every information he needed. She was shopping alone. He knew 'cause she'd told him yesterday. His daughter was the only person that could divert his attention from his blues.

After a couple of moments, cab stopped nearby huge IKEA's building at Brooklyn. He was right taking a taxi. The rain was pouring. Castle sighed with relief when he finally got to the entrance. The diner was crowded, but his redhead daughter wasn't hard to notice. Alexis sat by the window, flicking through some magazine. She didn't notice him coming. He wanted to give her a little scare.

"Boo!" The writer laughed, approaching her from behind. She squeaked and almost spilled her coffee.

"Dad! Don't do this!" The teenager reprimanded even though a ghost of smile appeared on her face. "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to spent some time with you. You said that you're gonna shopping alone, so I wanted to join you, but like I see, you're not alone…" He pointed at second set of dishes.

"Oh my…" The girl turned pale.

"What is it?" Castle asked curious. "Don't you have some new boyfriend, you want to hide from me, do you?"

"No, dad. It's… Well, I…"

"Oh c'mon, Alexis! What…" Castle started, but was cut off by very familiar voice.

"Rick…?" Kate Beckett whispered with surprise.

The writer turned towards her automatically, looking her up and down. She looked bad, really bad. But still stunningly beautiful. Finally, after what seemed like hours he locked his eyes with hers. How he loved her yes! Beckett blushed and smiled shyly. Crap, he was doomed. His heart started to beat erratically, how in the hell could he forget her!? He gave up and mirrored her insecure smile.

"Hi…"

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**23 days to go! It's _sextember_ guys!**


	7. Heart to heart

**Surprise! It's me again with brand new update especially for you my precious readers! ****Like I said, I update ASAP. I guess that 'possible' it's now... ;)**

** Thank you for all reviews and subscriptions! You rock!**

**My shitty school started today! Yay! I love it sooo much... Yuck! I got 44 hours per week this year! I am dead...**

**Again, this chapter is update WITHOUT BETA READING, so I am really sorry for all mistakes. My English isn't perfect, I know... Anyone want to be my Beta? doing Puss in Buts' look**

**Disclaimer: Guess what? I don't own Castle!**

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**CHAPTER 7**

**"Heart to heart"**

Kate looked at her reflection in the bright bathroom. She looked like a crap. Shadows under her eyes looked almost like bad Halloween makeup. Even worse. It's no wonder, she haven't slept more then 3-4 hours per day. She ate only when Lanie came by. _Another walking zombie_ Alexis had named her when they met today morning. It meant Rick wasn't much better. In some creepy way it made her feel better.

The call from Alexis surprised her. Her proposition even more, but she accepted it in a heartbeat. Shopping with teenager was like a gift sent from heaven. Some kind of substitute. A very good one. The girl was so much like her father… Tomorrow Beckett had to get back to work at the precinct. She will be pretend she's ok. She'll have to deal with Ryan and Esposito in their 'overprotective brothers mode'. She'll have to work partnerless… And today is some sort of a painkiller to have good memories to remember in her worst days without Castle by her side.

After one last look at her reflection, Beckett finally dried her hands and headed back to Alexis waiting for her at their table. Her heart stopped when she reached the corner. Alexis wasn't alone. Oh crap…

"… time with you. You said that you're gonna shopping alone, so I wanted to join you, but like I see, you're not alone…" Castle pointed at second set of dishes. Her dishes.

"Oh my…" Alexis turned pale. Before Kate thought that maybe she set this up to make them talk with each other, but now she saw that this poor girl was terrified and have no idea what to do.

"What is it?" Writer asked curious. "Don't you have some new boyfriend, you want to hide from me, do you?" Beckett smile unintentionally. Always the daddy's girl…

"No, dad. It's… Well, I…"

"Oh c'mon, Alexis! What…" Castle started again and then Kate decided to make her presence felt.

"Rick…?" Beckett whispered weakly. It didn't come out like she planned.

He turned instantly and watched her. His eyes burned into her skin. Finally, after what seemed like hours he locked his eyes with hers. How she missed this two deep blue oceans of emotions capable of showing infinite love in one glance. They still had the same expression. Kate blushed and smiled shyly. Castle gulped and sent her his own insecure smile.

"Hi…"

And then the staring contest continued. She didn't know how long they just stood there eying each other, but she certainly didn't mind. They were in the same place, only few steps apart and that was the only thing that mattered for her. Kate didn't think that she would see him in the near future. They probably would stand like that for hours if Alexis didn't coughed meaningfully. They both blushed then.

"Well, I probably should get going…" Kate started, but was interrupted by…

"NO!" Castle screamed hysterically without thinking. "Ugh! I mean… You were here first, right? I'll go."

"No, it's okay… Really, I have to…"

"No, really…"

"But it's really…"

"Oh my God, guys! You sound like some crappy soap opera or something!" Alexis cut them off frustrated. "No one goes anywhere! If you both are here, maybe you could finally tell me what happened?"

"Alexis, it's not the right time and I…"

"Stop it, dad! I'm going to college after this holiday, so don't give me that 'you're too young' line. Everybody know except me. I tried Lanie, Grams even the boys and I was hoping that you tell me what's going on Kate, but apparently I was wrong. But I'm not gonna let it go, ok? So ether you both tell me now, or I'll be keep nagging you. Got it? Now sit and spill." Girl said frustrated and pointed at the chairs across from her.

Kate and Rick was too stunned by her outburst to even try to protest, so they followed her order. For a moment, writer forgot about their current situation and mumbled to Beckett. "She sounds like Lanie. I told you that this internship does no good…" Woman smiled sheepishly.

"I heard that!" Teenager pointed out playfully. "Listen, I am sorry that I had to bawl you out, but you didn't give me any choice…" She added.

"It's ok…" Castle sighed. "You're right, I should have told you straightaway. I just… I'm afraid what you'd think of me…"

"Rick… Don't do this to yourself…" Kate whispered and cautiously put her hand on the top of his. He didn't pull away, so she left it there.

"OK. You know that we solved Kate's mom's murder, right Pumpkin?" The girl nodded. "You saw the guy…"

"Yeah… That's awful, he was Vice President! And your mom's murder was only one of much more, right? I feel for his family… " Alexis exclaimed disgusted. Beckett and Castle shivered.

"About that…" Rick took deep breath. "Gram knew him once. Romantically…"

"Oh my God! That's terrible! This is why you didn't tell me earlier? Poor Gram…" Redhead was concerned.

"There is more…" Beckett added, squeezing harder writer's hand.

"What is it?"

"He's your grandfather…" Castle said, shuddering again.

"My grand… But that means… He's… Gram… You… Oh God! Dad! Oh!" Alexis stood and quickly embraced her pale dad in rib-crushing hug. "I am so sorry! Why didn't you tell me? Oh daddy…"

They stayed that for a quite a while. Dad and daughter, the best team in the world. The writer felt like someone took heavy stone from his heart. He could breath normally again. Alexis didn't loathe him and it was all that mattered. After a while, Castle was the one pulling away. He wanted to keep the last of honor in front of Beckett. But when he looked towards her, he found an empty chair.

"Pumpkin, where's Kate?" He asked the redhead who was still sitting on his lap. Girl looked up instantly.

"I don't know… She must have left and we didn't even notice. Great…" Alexis mumbled. "You should go after her, dad."

"Wha…What?" Rick chocked." Maybe she had to go somewhere…"

"Yeah right! Dad, please!" Alexis snorted. "That's why you're not together, isn't it? You feel guilty…"

"Alexis… It's really not a conversation I should be having with you…"

"No! Maybe you shouldn't, but you will, because you're ruining your life at that moment." The redhead started. "Didn't you see her? Or yourself? You both look like something that cat dragged in… Paige had that Lovebirds once. When one died, the second lived only 2 days and then died too. You are similar, you know? C'mon dad, it's obvious that you two can't live without another. And she doesn't blame you for what this monster did. So why are you doing this to yourselves?"

"Alexis…"

"Don't 'Alexis' me! You go home, get shower, shave and get change. Then you take you're best wine and buy beautiful bunch of flowers and then you drag yourself to Kate's. Got it?"

"I guess you thought of everything…"

"Well, I hope that I don't need to script further parts..." She looked at him meaningful.

"Alexis Castle!" Writer exclaimed. "I guess we should get going and stop this conversation. I'm getting embarrassed."

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**21 days to go!**


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